I Need an Intervention

Just stop shopping, Dumbass

I have let the spirit of gift-buying punch a huge hole in my wallet.  I should have seen this coming, seriously.  Here is one thing I've noticed about my self and the way I relate to money: When my savings account is looking healthy and I'm contributing to it regularly, I start taking the same kind of pleasure in adding to savings that I do buying stuff.  When I have large, necessary (but not fun) purchases, I get pouty, throw up my hands (metaphorically), and say "what's the use!?!"  I've noticed this before, but continue to get blindsided, especially now when stores are tempting me with deals too good to pass up!  But, as I know that I don't need more things, I've been buying things for other people, which is very nice of me, but not nice to my savings plan.

Coming right on the heels of my car insurance payment, I had to get BF an x-mas gift.  After that, I realized that since my brother is coming out to visit, I should get him one too.  Then I found another something awesome for one of my best friends, then because I was being so virtuous and giving, I bought myself a dress.  It's like I need a sponsor to call when I feel like I'm going to spend!  Also, I bought running shoes, but I honestly did need those and saved about 100 dollars.

So that's why things have been a bit quiet on the old blogfront--I've been too busy ordering things.  In the back of my mind, I'm honestly hoping that the dress I ordered doesn't look good so I can return it, so I guess that's positive?

Starting December 20th, I'm off for six weeks from job number 2, so I need to keep that in the back of my mind.  With only one job, that means no extra income, just breaking even. I have a car tax bill looming--mustn't forget.  And I made a decision that will give me a goal to focus on so I (hopefully) won't be distracted by other shiny things in the meantime.

All of the cool runners have started getting these Garmin GPS running watches.  Initially I scoffed because it's clunky and expensive and seems like a laughable luxury item.

It's huge! But friends tell me it's not cumbersome

Now I'm in a position where I painstakingly google map out running routines, but sometimes alter them while I'm out and have no idea how far I've run.  The other day, I set out on my 9 mile loop, but still felt good at the end and took a spin through the park winding up with 9.5 miles for the day.  If I had known I was already at 9.5, I certainly would have pushed for 10.  So you see, the only way I can properly train is by having a giant computer on my wrist that tells me how far I've gone at any given time.

Yeah, that's a stretch, but I'm just going to save up the points I earn on my Amazon Visa card, and also the change that I save to bring to the Coinstar machine, which gives me an Amazon Gift Certificate (or just gives me cash, but then the machine takes a percentage).  Hopefully, this savings goal will occupy my fickle brain enough that I'll stop yearning for other things.  Hopefully.

Tips For Frugal Gift Giving

Note:  I'm not  hater, but I'm not much of a gift-giver.  Thankfully, my friend Melissa is!  I called upon her to lend some frugal advice about the upcoming holiday season.



The holiday season is approaching, and it’s that time of year to get ready for get-togethers and gift giving. Even if you’re trying to be frugal, that doesn’t mean gift giving has to be a drag, nor do you have to be “cheap” (after all, there is a difference!). As a lover of all things Christmas, and especially gift giving, here are some tips I find handy to avoid going broke during the holidays.

1.  Handmade gifts: There are endless tutorials on blogs and other websites that have thousands of ideas for gifts that can be handmade and thoughtful. One favorite of mine is this tutorial on making bookmarks out of paint chips. This is especially great for young children to give to parents. One handmade gift that I made this year is something for my mom and sister. My grandfather was musician and I found some old brass tuning slides in a box that I took while cleaning out the home he lived in with my grandmother. I almost pitched the slides, but it dawned on me that these would make great necklaces. All I had to do was purchase chain and bails to match, and I made one for myself as well. He passed away last year, and I know these necklaces will be loved.

2.  Make a list: Having a list of people that you give gifts to, which should include all friends, family, and service people (the mailman, dog sitter, and so on), will help to eliminate unnecessary spending. Another good idea is to set a price point for each person, and to not stray from it. A physical list with set price points eliminates the urge to go broke on a last minute gadget or commercial “must have” item.

3.  Shop after the season and in advance: This is one of my favorite ways to Christmas shop, because it makes everything affordable. Everything in stores is priced and set out according to seasons. Most people won’t be wearing shorts in February, so that’s why shorts end up $5 on the clearance rack at the end of August. This works especially well if you are shopping for people with specific hobbies. My husband loves to golf, and this year he expressed interest in building his golf wardrobe. At the end of the season, I bought him a nice pair of golf khakis that were originally $30, but paid only $7, because it was the end of the season.

4.  Make donations: Making donations to a cause that the gift-recipient supports is not only thoughtful, it also helps with staying on a budget. For example, if a sibling if really passionate about helping the homeless, donating $25 in their name, or even donating needed edibles to a food bank, is a wonderful gift that is not only thoughtful, but helps out other people as well.

5.  Give services: This is a great idea for loved ones, especially children. Most parents would love to receive the gift of a house cleaned top to bottom, or the give of having their garden weeded for a month. Services can be gifted creatively by making a book of services for the recipient to use, or even producing a framed image of the service. Last year, “the kids” pitched in for my in-laws to have their carpet cleaned, and they loved it.

6.  Be creative with free samples: Many companies rely on getting their products purchased by handing out free samples. While the immediate thought might be, “Free samples? How tacky!”, consider their usefulness. Last year, I made a creative gift for my husband by collecting samples of colognes, shaving gels, bath gels, and other manly cosmetics, and putting them inside of a gift basket. He used the samples at home and during short weekend or overnight trips, and liked trying out the new products!

When it comes down to it, gift giving should be fun, not stressful! If gifts just aren’t in the budget, don’t be afraid to say so if there is someone in the family seriously wondering why all of your gifts are handmade, or even free. After all, it really is the thought that counts when it comes to giving a gift that is meaningful.

Want vs. Need

I've reached the point in my life where I really don't want or need anything.  Sure, sometimes I need to buy groceries or toilet paper, but the major items are taken care of.  I also don't really want anything.  I may overspend on clothes from time to time, but I don't want any more stuff in my life. My apartment is full, and I've reached the point where I like getting rid of things more than I like getting them.

I thrill at filling up a bag to drop at The Salvation Army, I'm making a concentrated effort to eat my way through all that pasta I hoarded a year ago.  Every time I eat another box, I feel a tremendous sense of satisfaction.  What I want now are experiences--going ice skating, taking a trip, having a nice meal, going to a good play/movie/ballet, having cocktails with my lovely friends, historical tourism, etc. Sadly, paying for experiences is keeping me poor, financially, but with my student loan debt, I'll be poor forever anyway--might as well live!

What's troubling though, is that I live with someone who still does want stuff.  This someone also wants to buy stuff for me, and when I say I don't want anything, that makes him sad.  I understand and appreciate the spirit of gift-giving, but does it always have to come in a box?  Can't I just accept a giant carton of egg nog and share that with everyone?  I really like egg nog.

My budget doesn't have much wiggle room right now, and I don't want to go out and buy a whole bunch of stuff because, well, it's coming home with me, and we're running out of space.  Plus, everything I bring into that apartment looks to me like something I will one day have to move, or sell at a loss.

Maybe it's just because I'm a lousy gift-giver.  I prefer instead of buying gifts for occasions to just buy that thing that you happen upon that's perfect for a person, and giving it to him or her whenever.  If you want to buy me something for my birthday or for xmas, take me out to a restaurant I like, or to a show.  If you don't want to do that, don't do anything, it doesn't hurt my feelings.  I'm lucky in that not many people expect things from me, or maybe they're lucky because it'd probably be scented candles all around (or something equally lame).  Either way, I have to accept that I'm not changing.

Anyone have any ideas for what to do in this situation?