Instead of a compulsive spender, I've spent years trying to morph myself into a compulsive saver. Saving gives me the same rush as spending--even a better rush sometimes because I rarely feel as good when I spend, there's often some guilt/letdown. Unfortunately, the compulsive aspect is still the same, and I frequently find myself checking my bank balance daily; lamenting that I can't pay all the bills RIGHT NOW, and wishing my month away to get to the next paycheck faster.
Case in point: I got paid last week, paid off my credit cards and then split the remaining money and put it into my various savings accounts: Emergency Fund, Travel Fund, and Regular Savings. I haven't added to my Emergency Fund in quite a long time because I'm at my savings goal, but I figured I can slip a bit in there every now and then--nets me extra interest.
Almost immediately, I started regretting that there was no money left over to put in my Roth IRA, even though that's what this month's 3rd paycheck is for, and I've been mentally planning on that for six weeks. Still got the guilt for just not having/saving enough.
Then, a couple days ago, I went through this whole rigmarole with moving money around so I could send in a payment on my student loans. My next paycheck is the 15th and my student loan payment isn't due until the 21st, but I started panicking because I always pay it early. I don't have to pay it early, it doesn't really do me any favors if I do, and it's better that I put my money into savings like I did, rather than send it in to the government.
Still, I had a rather extraordinary mini-meltdown where I frantically pulled money from each account into checking, then realized I was acting like a moron and moved it all back. Thankfully I get free transfers, but ING's automatic transfer robots must think I'm a crazy person.
Clearly upping the yoga has not made me any more zen, so I'm just going to actively try to stop being such a spaz. There is no need to always pay things before the due date, unless I have the money and I'm not taking it from something else; and I can't expect to be able to save half my paycheck because I simply don't make that much money! All I can do is focus on spending less, and saving what I can. That's my new mantra.
I'm that way too... but slowly I've learned that we need to live too! My EF is far from fully funded right now, I'm currently trying to get $3K in there before Xmas, but in the end we can only do what we can do! :)
ReplyDeleteDon't worry - ING feels the same way about me. I try to tell myself that it's good for me to have these automatic deposits set up, but sometimes I end up transferring the money right back out for a recurring expenses or if I'm having a tight month. It can look pretty silly.
ReplyDelete